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Necklaces & Nooses Page 17
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“I was in love with James, but he kept blowing me off. He claimed he didn’t love her, but still he wouldn’t give me the time of day. I was angry, so I told her James and I were sleeping together. They were holding on to their loveless marriage for no reason. I was the one who was best for James. He knew it; he just didn’t want to hurt her. She didn’t even care about him, but now she’s dead, and he won’t even talk to me.”
I was reeling. I was in shock from what I was hearing. I couldn’t even fathom why Amy would do such a thing. Was she obsessed in a Fatal Attraction sort of way?
“Amy, I don’t understand. Why would you do such a thing?”
“I told you, because I love him, and he belongs with me.”
Okay. I had no idea she had felt this way about our boss’s husband, but as twisted as this conversation was, I still didn’t understand how it had anything to do with Solange’s death.
“Okay, Amy, I get that, but what does this have to do with Solange’s death? You being in love with James didn’t kill her.”
“Don’t you see, Presley? Solange killed herself because she couldn’t imagine a life without James. If I hadn’t lied, she wouldn’t have felt that way and would still be alive.” This statement brought about a new batch of fresh tears.
Ahhhh, this was making more sense now. Amy didn’t realize Solange was murdered. Which meant she must not have paid attention to the news or to Willie, because I knew he talked to her. This girl had some issues. “Amy, you can calm down. Solange didn’t commit suicide.”
Amy looked up in surprise “W-h-h-h-at?” she stuttered.
“Solange was murdered, so unless you killed her, this isn’t your fault.” Amy was only guilty of horrible judgment. “But you do need to tell all this to the detective”.
“I’m so sorry, Presley. I know what I did was horrible. Not only was it horrible, but it also got me fired from a job I really liked. I don’t know what I’m going to do.”
“Amy, I’m sure you will find something. I would just give you the advice to stay away from James and the family.”
Shortly after Amy left, my phone rang.
“Presley?” A soft voice belonging to what I thought was an older woman came over the phone. I wasn’t sure who it was. “This is Lorraine Barker.”
Wow, this was a shocker. I wouldn’t have in a million years expected a phone call from Solange’s mother. I mean, she had been extremely nice at the funeral and the couple times before when I met her at the store, but why was she calling me?
“Hello, Mrs. Barker. Is there something I can help you with?”
“First, you can call me Lorraine, dear. I don’t stand on formality.”
“Okay. Lorraine.”
“Now, I’m sure you’re wondering why I called.”
“Well, yes I am.”
She chuckled. “I would expect as much. I was hoping you would meet me at the Tea Room for coffee at four this afternoon?”
I mentally reviewed my calendar in my head, and though I had a couple things to do, I still had time to meet her.
“Sure.”
“Thanks, dear. See you then.”
I reached the Tea Room about fifteen minutes early. I admit I was nervous. Mrs. Barker—Lorraine—was so put together, and I always felt very out of place with people like that. I struggled forever with what to wear, finally deciding on a simple black sheath dress and black heels. You would think when I had a store full of clothes to chose from it wouldn’t be so hard. A strand of pearls and pearl earrings to accessorize created a look that was elegant and understated. I hoped so, anyway. I wanted to look like I fit in.
“How may I assist you?” said the hostess as I walked up. The hostess here was dressed just as well as I was.
“I’m meeting Lorraine Smith, but I’m early.”
“Ah yes, Lorraine. Right this way.” She started walking into the dining area. “Good thing you’re early. She loves people who are punctual and likes it even better when you arrive first. She likes being waited on, if you know what I mean.”
“I completely know what you mean.” I was glad I had arrived early. We reached the table, and she motioned for me to sit down.
“I’ll bring you some bread and water while you wait.”
“Thanks.” I knew Lorraine was being nice, but it sure sounded like a jail sentence. Or maybe she wasn’t as nice as I thought. I didn’t have much time to contemplate as it was only a few seconds later when I saw Lorraine walking toward me. It would be hard to be early and impress her if she was ten minutes early. I stood up as I felt it was a respectful thing she would appreciate, and I could tell by the smile on her face that she was pleased.
“How are you this afternoon, Lorraine?” I shook her hand and then waited until she sat down, to sit back down myself.
“I’m doing all right, dear. Thank you for asking. I can’t say it’s been easy, but you must push through. I have always prided myself on being strong for the family, and this is no different.”
“I have to admire that, Lorraine. I’m not sure I would be the same way. You are a strong woman.”
She smiled. “I’m sure you are wondering why I asked you to meet me.”
“Well, I didn’t think it was just because you needed company.”
“Don’t sell yourself short, dear. Under other circumstances, I think you would be a fun lunch partner to have.”
I smiled. She really was a sweet lady.
“I want to talk to you about James.”
Okay. I was a little more than surprised. I had thought hard about what she might want to talk to me about, and had assumed she wanted to talk to me about Steven. After all, he was the one who had come to the boutique drunk. She must have read the look on my face and realized this seemed strange to me.
“James and I have always been close. I know that Steven told you the story of James, Sheila, and Solange. The part he didn’t tell you, that he doesn’t know and neither does Sheila, is that James came to me in the very beginning and told me how he felt about Solange the first time he saw her.”
This was interesting. I wouldn’t have thought that a college student would have the integrity, if that was the right word, to approach the mother of the two women he was caught between. I had to give him a lot of credit for that. It would be hard to do as a grown adult, much less in your early twenties. I also found it interesting that she used Solange, not Sally. As her mother, I would have thought she would use her given name.
“You have to understand they had just come to me to tell me that Sheila was pregnant. A much bigger scandal in those days than now. Back then young ladies in that predicament had the grace to be ashamed.” She sniffed.
I was trying my hardest to save my million questions for when she was done talking.
“James and Sheila had come to me in private the week before and told me that she was fourteen weeks pregnant. She had waited until it was too late to have an abortion, even though I wouldn’t have allowed it anyway, as much as I had ever had any control over what Sheila did, so James would have no choice but to marry her. At least that’s what she thought in her mind. It almost worked, except for Solange. James is an honorable man, and was even back then when he was young, and he had asked Sheila to marry him once he found out. We were going to announce it at the family Christmas party.” Lorraine paused.
“I take it that part never happened?”
“No.” She shook her head sadly. “He showed up and saw Solange, and it was all over. Both his relationship with Sheila, and the relationship between Sheila and Solange. So, like I said, he came to me and told me he couldn’t marry Sheila. That he would stay away from Solange if I told him to, but he couldn’t be in a loveless marriage, and I agreed. It wouldn’t have been good for Sheila or him. Though Sheila became so bitter, I wonder if it was any better.” She paused for a second, reflecting.
I took this moment to ask one of the questions I had been biting my tongue on. “So if he agreed to stay away from Solange, how did they e
nd up together?”
“Remember I said he told me he would stay away from Solange if I wanted him to. I didn’t make him go away, though maybe I should have. And before you judge me for being a bad mother…”
“Lorraine, I’m not—”
She held up her hand to stop me. “I feel that we all need to make our own way, and life is not easy. I knew Sheila would be devastated and of course as her mother I didn’t want that, but I also didn’t want to deny Solange and James the chance for a happy life with each other, if they were really meant to be. I thought for a long time it was infatuation and would fizzle out, but they were so clearly meant for each other. No huge shock, as I didn’t think that James and Sheila were very compatible. Sheila was just so desperate to hang on to him she tried to change, but it would have come out eventually.”
I wanted to ask about the baby, but didn’t want to be too pushy. Plus, it was a bit of an uncomfortable subject.
“Shelia was too far along for any other course of action besides having the baby. She wanted nothing to do with it and was distraught, understandably so. I sent her away to my sister’s, and she took the next semester off from school. She had the baby, gave it up for adoption, returned to school in the fall, and pretended it never happened. Therapy wasn’t the thing to do as it is now, and no one ever really thought about it. But I wish I knew then what I know now. I would have insisted Shelia get some help. The emotional stress of giving a baby up, no matter how much Sheila tried to pretend she didn’t care, on top of losing to her sister the man she thought she was going to marry, I feel ruined her zest for finding another fulfilling relationship. We try to do right by our children, but being a parent is never easy, and it is so easy to second guess yourself when they turn out to be less than well-adjusted adults.” Lorraine smiled ruefully.
“Lorraine, I’m not a parent, but I think most people do the best they can. It’s always easy to second guess yourself after any decision you make.”
“Thank you, dear. You do the best you can, but it’s sure not easy living with the consequences of your actions, as Sheila and James have recently found out.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, another mistake I may have made is I helped Sheila hide the baby and subsequent adoption from James.”
“How? He knew she was pregnant and it was too late to not have the baby. I don’t think I follow.”
“I am not proud of this, but Sheila wanted nothing to do with James or anything related to him. When I sent her to my sister’s, she begged me to tell James she lost the baby. I think it was a pride thing to her. She didn’t want him to think she had gone through the pregnancy and then given something up. She wanted him to think she didn’t care. She hurt so badly I wanted to do something to give her some peace.”
“Lorraine, I think you did the right thing.”
“Well, maybe not, after I tell you the recent turn of events. The child that Shelia gave up for adoption twenty years ago just recently surfaced.”
“Oh.”
“Except that she somehow found Solange and thought she was her birth mother instead of Sheila.”
“Oh.” I was sounding like a broken record, but I was having one of those rare moments where I didn’t know what to say. And I had started to wonder why she had chosen me to tell this story to.
“What made this even worse was Solange never knew that Shelia had a child by James. She came to me when the girl found her, and I confessed that I had known all along. She was understandably angry at all of us. She felt betrayed. That was the reason for her wanting a divorce.”
That was news. James had said he wanted the divorce based on how Solange had acted, but then I guess indirectly he had caused the divorce through actions from twenty years ago. What a mess. I couldn’t believe Solange kept this all in. What emotional confusion she must have experienced.
“I tried to get her to see reason,” Lorraine continued. “James was also very upset with me because he felt I should have told him the truth all those years ago, and he was right. Both James and Solange tried to talk to Sheila, but she refused to listen to either of them. They might have had their differences, but they both agreed that they wanted the girl to be a part of the family. She was petrified the girl would find her, which she did. She came to the house several times, as Solange had told her where she lived and who she was, once Solange realized what was going on. She had no ill will toward the girl, Amber, and felt that Sheila and James should get to know her. She wanted to get to know her; after all, this girl was blood related and the child of James, and as mad as she might have been, she would never have refused to let Amber into the family. James agreed. He wasn’t happy, like I said that this had all been kept from him, and I think he has met with Amber a few times, and they are trying to build some sort of relationship. Shelia is still refusing. I just don’t know what to do with her.”
“Lorraine, maybe she just needs to figure it out herself. If she isn’t open to meeting her daughter, is it wise to push it?” I was sure Lorraine didn’t need or want my advice, but there had to be some reason she called me here, so I figured I had nothing to lose.
“I agree, Presley. I just hate to see Sheila miss out on what could be a great opportunity, but you’re right, I can’t force it. She is just so bitter about the whole thing. Sheila has just felt shut out of everything. Solange was the oldest, and she always doted on Steven. They were so close even as adults, probably too close, as Solange was always bailing Steven out, long after I washed my hands of him in an attempt at tough love. Sheila wanted to be the one Steven depended on. She didn’t understand why he didn’t, especially since Solange was adopted, a fact Sheila could never just let go.”
“I was wondering about that, Lorraine. What made you adopt Solange?”
Lorraine paused. After all she had already told me, I didn’t think I was overstepping my bounds, but then was second-guessing myself when she remained silent. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry,” I said.
“You’re fine dear. It’s just hard to talk about it, even now.”
She paused again, and I wasn’t going to push her. I knew she would tell me in her own time.
“You see, one of the reasons I was so understanding when Sheila and James came to me to tell me she was pregnant was that I had been in the same predicament.” She stopped to let the words sink in.
“You mean Solange was yours?” I was amazed. This was not what I expected at all. I didn’t even see any family resemblance, and you’d think there would be some.
“Yes. I fell head over heels for a young man when I was nineteen, and I thought that was it. We would be together, travel the world, eventually settle down, get married, have babies, the whole works. I thought he wanted that, too, and maybe he did for a time.” She paused again, seemingly lost in her own thought. I just waited patiently, which was not easy. “But I unexpectedly got pregnant. Through hindsight it should have been expected.” She laughed. “I was such a naïve, foolish girl back then. I didn’t have the sexual knowledge you young ladies have now. I was also naïve enough to think he would be as happy as I was. Sure, it rushed up our timetable, but I was ready to settle down. I thought I would tell him, and he would marry me. Instead, he enlisted in the service and said he would call when he got to boot camp. He never did.”
“Oh, Lorraine, I’m so sorry.” I reached across the table and put my hand on hers. What a heart-wrenching story.
“Oh, don’t be sorry dear. This happened a long time ago, and I got Solange out of it, and I ended up marrying a wonderful man I got to spend the best years of my life with.”
I smiled. “I guess I don’t understand then why Sheila and Steven think Solange is adopted?”
“Because that’s what we told them. Just like Sheila, I was sent to an aunt to have the baby. My aunt had a friend who couldn’t have children, so she was going to raise the child as her own. I wasn’t happy, but didn’t have much of a choice, and I knew this was the best for the child. I was but a
child myself and unwed at that. Back then an unwed mother didn’t have as many prospects as they do now. I soon met Paul, we fell in love, and got married. Within a couple years we had Sheila and then Steven. I thought of Solange often, but knew she was doing well through my aunt, and I knew she had a happy life. Then one day I got a call. The couple that had taken Solange in had been in a car accident and died. The family was going to send Solange to an orphanage, and I couldn’t bear it. I went to Paul and confessed, sure that he would throw me out, and in the moments after I told him I realized what an amazing man I had married. Not only did he not throw me out, when I told him that’s what I thought he would do, he scolded me for being silly, and he immediately said we needed to take her in. We decided to say we were adopting the daughter of an old family friend who had died, because Solange had no idea she had been adopted by them, and obviously Shelia and Steven had no idea I’d had a child before them, and we felt it easier.”